Trying To Save Your Relationship?
Spend A Day of Counseling With Experienced Marriage Counselors
Your Marriage Issues are Private – Come To Suburban Philadelphia For A Day of Counseling With Marriage Counseling Experts
When your relationship is in deep trouble, you may have a difficult time addressing underlying issues in a single session. Relationships in crisis often need a concentrated effort that delves deep into issues and stops the emotional bleeding that can cause irreparable damage.
If your relationship hangs by a thread, you may want to consider a full day or weekend of intensive counseling to get a jumpstart towards repairing the damage.
You and your partner will meet with us in a home in a wooded area of Ardmore PA. You will be given large blocks of time in counseling sessions.
You will see us in sessions with your partner and alone to enable us to get a clear, in-depth picture of your underlying issues and how to resolve them. We offer a comprehensive program geared toward your specific needs. We listen carefully to your issues and get to the heart of your problems quickly.
We charge $595 for a half day of counseling and $975 for a full day. Upon request, we provide a receipt for your insurance company.
You will go home with written skills to practice, tapes to listen to, and recommendations of specific books to read to reinforce this intensive experience, you will be given a free follow-up phone call a week after the session.
Can a relationship with years of problems be changed in only a day?
When you both wish your relationship could be saved, the chance of a successful outcome in a day-long intensive is excellent. And, even if only one of you is deeply committed to saving the relationship, chances are still good. Often a couple just needs to change the trajectory of their relationship so that it is no longer spiraling downward but is heading upwards toward healing and romance. We will show you step-by-step how to grow your relationship.
We have helped nearly 1000 couples save their marriages and heal their families over more than twenty years in practice.
Follow-up sessions, either on the phone or in person, reinforce and expand the work you have done with us.
Most of our counseling intensives need follow-up sessions. We jumpstart your relationship in a short period of time in our office. We then follow-up to make sure the problems we addressed are being resolved with lasting changes.
We continue to teach you skills and give you homework, and we follow up to get feedback from you. We evaluate your progress and go over any new issues. We help you transform toxic emotions that taint your relationship into exciting energy for growth.
We do not focus on the “content” of your arguments or problems. Content are the details of the relationship that everyone gets stuck on. For example: your wife wants you to work less and spend more time with the kids, but you need to work harder to make mortgage payments and save for college tuitions down the road. Many couples have these issues. They are not unique, they can be debated endlessly and there is never a simple solution.
What matters more is how issues are discussed and resolved. Are all options on the table, do both partners feel like they have impact on the other, and do both partners communicate in a way that respects the other?
Often in bad marriages discussions turn into arguments or painful stand-offs because couples say nasty things to each other that cause a spiral of resentment. Many couples try to resolve issues by defending their positions as though they were in court. Defensive language that tries to justify behavior or abusive language that expresses anger and frustration are the most common reasons relationships fail.
Unfortunately this is the language we hear and see on TV and on film. This is what we were brought up hearing in our homes. This is the “junk food” of communication – the more you do it the worse it gets.
We put you and your spouse on a crash program to learn effective communication skills. These are skills you were never taught:
- How to listen without being defensive.
- How to get your point across without demeaning your partner.
- How to protect yourself when your partner uses abusive or demeaning language.
Like any other skills you learn in life, relationship communication skills are often feel wrong at first even though we know they are right. We fall into old patterns that we know have never worked in the past because these patterns are habitual; they are ingrained into our thought processes and our patterns of behavior.
To break these bad habits we need to know that there is a professional counselor who will keep you on track and guide you through issues so you can feel comfortable with your new skills.
The chance to save your marriage is worth the drive to our offices.
If you live in the midwest, south or eastern US you are only a one to two hour plane ride to our office in suburban Philadelphia. You may find that you no longer have the time to try out many therapists in your area who do not have the focus and experience that we have.
At critical periods in a relationship you do not get second chances, often by the time you are considering counseling you have already been through many trials, the marriage has had it’s second and third changes to heal. At this point you know you need a completely different way of communicating with your partner and it must stick for the long haul.
Most people follow similar patterns of behavior with all types of relationships. Often they get out of one bad relationship only to find out that the next relationship they establish has the same underlying problems.
If you listen to my interview on the side of this page you will hear me say “I don’t save marriages, I save people” If you come into therapy with one goal, that you must have our staff save your marriage, you are too focused on factors that lie outside of your own control. If you come into counseling with the understanding that by improving your own relationship skills you will be a better partner in any relationship no matter what happens with your current marriage, then your chances of saving your marriage increase tremendously.
If you want to save your marriage and your spouse has given up hope and does not want to come with you, we urge you and your spouse to call us for a free consultation. We will fully explain how we work, what our methods are and what you can expect. I can tell you from years of experience that many people who come here devoid of all hope leave energized and full of enthusiasm because they at least have a clear understanding of what is wrong how they contributed to the problem.
Most of the time couples have no idea what is actually hurting their relationship. They make assumptions and react to surface issues.
Often underlying issues such as an overall inability of one spouse to vocalize his or her emotional needs can lead to a spiral of problems that erupt with deep feelings of resentment and frustration. Other times a spouse will carry bad habits learned from work or old relationships that poison the air in the relationship. Sarcasm, mild put downs, or even just an unfounded lack of trust can make a relationship intolerable after many years of tiny jabs and accusations.
“Stonewalling” is another dysfunctional tactic that infects a relationship. One partner will stonewall the other and shut them out completely from having any emotional impact on them because they feel frustrated. Stonewalling makes a bad situation worse. We show couples how to address stonewalling and find better ways to resolve issues.
We teach couples how to confront each other with a “sandwich”. Sandwiches are confrontations that simultaneously confront and support the person you are talking to. You need to confront your spouse with respect and kindness, but you also need to make sure that you are heard. This is a very difficult skill to learn, and we give you the fundamentals for developing this skill. We then follow-up with phone sessions to make sure you are both practicing your new skills.
When couples learn what is really causing problems in the relationship they can finally start working at the roots of issues instead of blaming everything on the petty issues that are just flashpoint for problems. Smart couples welcome the opportunity to learn and adapt to new information so that they can finally give their marriage that one last chance to succeed.
We do not offer compromises and mutual agreements. We offer an opportunity to identify and work out issues that have the potential to permanently change the entire emotional experience of you marriage. Love lost can be regained when you can re-experience the emotions that you both felt when your marriage began. These feelings are never lost. They are just hidden by more painful emotions that grew out of bad habits, ingrained thought processes and poor communication skills. When you eliminate the toxic cloud of painful emotions, old feelings can come up that you have not felt in years. Often times couples feel old feelings of love and romance shortly after their first day in our offices.
Take the first step towards a better relationship. Pick up the phone and make that important first call. We are here to help you.
Arlene Foreman, M.S.
Jacqueline Summers, Psychologist
Pennsylvania Couples Counseling